THE WOMAN WHO MISSED HER FLIGHT AT HKIA: ACTUAL TRANSLATION

*yawn*

Apparently it was done by the Fringe Festival.

Someone put a logo on the end, quick!

OK funny, definitely, but a) what's a gumbo? and b) I'm so sick of people sh*tting on Auckland.

Auckland is sh*t

gumbo is asian for "jumbo"

I was loving this whole thing until they started dissing Auckland. Ummm, surely if you're trying to attract visitors to Wellington, your lowest hanging fruit as an audience are Aucklanders?

PS - the gumbo refers to a restaurant called Sweet Mother's Kitchen in Welly, they serve gumbo.

Only in Wellington do they believe someone actually wants to go to Wellington.

The rest of us know the truth. People go to Auckland.

pretty pretty pretty funny if you ask me. Lags a bit but. Just hope she wasn't hysterical cos she'd just lost her child in a flight accident or some shit......that would be a bit dark.

Clems Wellington? Positively Wellington Tourism?

Funny, topical, not sure whether I'd send it on to a whole bunch of people but maybe a couple.

If you get sick of people slagging Aucklanders 4:10pm then tell the wanky tools that live there to stop name-dropping, talking about shite no normal person cares about (like how you know someone who knows the guy who owns that restaurant that's like, you know, totally cool) being complete pretenders, taking themselves too seriously, pretending to have plenty of money when they live off credit cards week to week, moaning about the rest of the country....

oh fuck off back to wherever you're from

Her girlfriend was probably in Wellington getting her moustache tinted in preparation for the Wellington Labour Party Gals in Business meet-up.

Fact: Auckland is full to the brim of people who come from elsewhere in the country, even from Wellington.

Now go stuck a Jaffa up your sorry little arse.

So let me get this straight 6:43pm, are you saying aloof, wanky namedroppers do not exist in Auckland?

Wake up and smell your shitty little soy-free double de-caff latte. And while you're there tell the tosser who made it to get over himself.

3:23... No Aucklander would ever bag a Wellingtonian the way you are slagging Aucklanders with your weeping and grossly innaccurate generalisations. Get that chip off your shoulder.

Example of how Auckland is wanky.....take something that's as proudly unpretentious as University radio. But what does university radio stand for in Auckland? A training ground for little assholes wanting to become the next Mikey Havoc. Tossers that want to be on the cover of REMIX magazine.

Only Aucklanders could turn something as organic as student radio and poison it with wanky bollocks.

I'm sorry but Auckland is a joke. There are so many examples of why this is so.

I think you'll find in Auckland University radio is actually run as a business.

I went to Wellington for the 7's, it was awesome. No wonder they are moving it to Auckland in 2011 when we get our new 60,000 seater stadium paid for with amongst other things Wellington tax payers money, will be massive. Suckers!

I love my Mac.

Even Fat Freddy's are moving up here.

Waaahahahaaaaaa.

3.43 - you're the joke buddy.

When the freezing gale force winds over Wellington warm up over the centre of the north island, they turn into the warm breeze that we sail our yachts on across the beautiful Hauraki gulf. Suckers!

In my expert opinion, (cos I enjoy being an Auckland wanker), Wellingtonians spend most of their lives looking over their shoulders at Auckland, snivelling that Aucklanders take their taxes, steal their big corporates, take their glory and obstruct their general progress in life.

Aucklanders on the other hand, are prone to forgetting the village of Wellington even exists. For which they can be forgiven because everyone knows there is nothing past the Bombay Hills. Could I have another double soy latte please?

Okay then, so Auckland is completely free of wanky, aloof people?

Find a non-Auckland Kiwi living in Auckland that you know and like, someone you think is a fair-minded person, and ask them if they think Aucklanders are aloof.

Here endeth the lesson.

5:53pm - I think you'll find you've missed the point.

Auckland, Sydney for beginners. Nuff said.

Are you all too provincial to appreciate both cities? the two are not mutually exclusive - and both have their good points. Maybe you should try traveling overseas to broaden your minds and stop the petty bickering....and realise that a latte is a ubiquitous drink, not just available in Auckland.

I think this guy is case and point that the Wellington weather turns people crazy.
Get back to your juggling / african drumming / dreadlock growing / ukellele playing / auckland hating.
Cheers.

Hahahaha. I can just imagine this guy... sitting in his office down there in Wellington tearing out his hair at the very mention of Auckland.

Sorry buddy, but until you guys down there get a Kelly Tarlton's or a Rainbow's End then you'll truly be nothing. You haven't lived until you've seen sharks and ridden a log flume ride ALL IN ONE DAY !!!!!!!!!!!

Bro, I've travelled....Asia, U.S, U.K, Aussie. I've learnt lots....including how to tell whether the person with the Kiwi accent is from Auckland or not.

Aucklanders are easy to spot - fairly up themselves. Move on.

7pm - relax, just having fun on a blog....hey, did you get choked up reading Paul Holmes' Sunday Herald column a couple of months back about how he cut his finger at Cibo in Parnell? The Maitre'd came running over with a band-aid and everything ended beautifully. I'm sure this - ridiculous trite for the rest of us - really captivated Auckland on a deep level.

gross overstatements if ever i've heard them. i'd love to see some of your work. do you do that Easy Off Bamm stuff? Because you said it cleans up every single stain, but when I tried it on my shower it didn't even come close.

If the only Aucklanders you've met are wankers... then I guess that says something about you too.

Like attracts like my insecure friend.

God you guys are sensitive. Go and hug someone wearing a George FM t-shirt or something.

this really is funny.

an argument over rat and mice.

the rest of world are only really interested in queenstown.

wellington is at best a quick walk around the shops and cafe's. a very quick one when it is miserable, wet, cold and bloody windy.

auckland is just plain ugly. the place looks like it was done on the cheap, approved by a city council seriously suffering from brain damage.

the beauty of new zealand is found well away from these two dummy spitting siblings.

have a nice life.

You guys in Welly are just sour because Iron Maiden didn't play down in your little village...

BWAAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!

You Wellingtonians are so funny. It runs deep doesn't it?. Very deep. The crack in your psyche that tells you Wellington is better than Auckland. It's a crack alright. A big hairy crack I call MY ARSE!